Ask MR!
by Welsh Gem
Summary: Ask the Maximum Ride crew ANYTHING! FAX! EGGY! And Dylan will get hurt! YAY! You may even ask Jeb a question. Or Valenica. Or Ella. Or Ari. Or ANYONE ELSE!
1. Intro

**AN/ I will be addressed as 'Gem' in this one. **

Gem: HEY GUYS! Now, if there's already someone who already has done an 'Ask The Maximum Ride Crew' , I am not stealing your idea. Every book, film, cartoon and whatever else might have got one. God Dammit, TREASURE PLANET HAS ONE!

Everyone: *looks at me creepily*

Gem: He-he. Sorry. *Coughs* Right, how about we start off with a few of _my _questions!

Dylan: Yawn

Gem: *Pulls out a very big gun and points it at Dylan* Shut up or the trigger gets pulled.

Dylan: O_o

Max: DO IT!

Gazzy: Cool.

Gem: Okay. First one for Dylan. Why won't you just leave Max alone?

Dylan: I love her...

Gem: THEN DON'T LOVE HER, STUPID!

Dylan...*whimper*...

Gem: Gazzy, why do you love explosives so much?

Gazzy: Coz their pretty when they blow up and they make a big BANG and they do a lot of damage to people I don't like!

Iggy: Yeah dude! *do a high five with Gazzy*

Gem: Boys!


	2. Gazzy likes Blondes!

Gem: WOO! A few hours in and already a review! Alright, from I LOVE PYROS ():

To Iggy, which is better? C4 or a hand grenade?

To Gazzy, will you marry me?

Iggy: I LOVE THEM BOTH! Anything that goes KABOOM! Is my type of thing!

Gem: okay...

Gazzy: You do know I'm eight, right?

Gem: Well, if you were a suitable age, would you?

Gazzy: *shrugs* Probably. Is she a blonde? *looks hopeful*

Gem: WHAT DOES BEING BLONDE HAVE ANYTHING TO DO IT?

Gazzy: *Bambi eyes* Just asking.

Nudge: OMG! Gazzy likes blondes? That's kinda weird because Gazzy is a blonde but that doesn't matter really and-

Gem: *duct tapes Nudge's mouth then binds her hands behind her back* It'll come off when you get asked a question.

Angel: Nudge says get this duct tape off of me!

Gem: Sorry, no can do.

Angel: *turns to readers* Nudge says ask her a question so she can talk.

Max: Don't. Seriously, don't. It's worse here than it is in the books!


	3. Nudge's Dream Wedding

Gem: YAY! MORE REVIEWS AND QUESTIONS! Right, I'll start with Awesomeest's questions.

Iggy: What kind of name is Awesomeest?

Gem: Does it matter? In the fan fiction world, Ig, you can name yourself anything. But it's best to try and avoid 'Hitler' or' Terrorist Bomber' otherwise people would give ya funny looks.

Iggy: Oh.

Gem: Right, the question is...to Nudge,

Nudge: *muffle*

Angel: She says YAY!

Gem: YAY! Is MY thing. *glares at Nudge* Right, To Nudge, have you ever thought about marrying Iggy? *rips off duct tape*

Nudge: OW! THAT HURT! IT'S WORSE THAN THAT TIME I GOT STUNG MY A SWARM OF BEES!

Gem: Just answer the question...

Nudge: Okay...when I was little I used to have a crush on Iggy but I don't have a crush on him now. When I was little, I thought we'd have a big white wedding with loads of éclairs and chocolate fingers!

Gem: Okay...Next one for Max, ever thought about going lesbian?

Dylan: No because she loves me.

Gem: SHUT UP YOU NICLEY-BROUGHT UP, TEST TUBE CLONE!

Max: YEAH SHUT THE H-E-DOUBLE TOOTHPICKS UP! Back to the question, no I haven't. Before Fang, I was kinda hooked on making sure the flock was safe but then something clicked then I just loved him more than a friend.

Gem: I hope that answers your questions, Awesomeest! Now for Chocogirl24's questions.

Iggy: Another weird name?

Gem: Iggy, what have I said?

Iggy: Sorry.

Gem. Firstly, Chocogirl24 wants to make sure that Fang know that she loves him.

Fang: I get it all the time *smiles and winks*

Gem: Nice, and she wants Dylan to know that his death is number one on her Chrimbo list. And it is on mine! I hope Dylan dies in the next book (out in February) and you can read the first eight chapters on the James Patterson website.

Dylan: Why does everyone want me dead?

Gem: Because you're trying to split up the world's cutest couple*points at Fang and Max* for your own selfish reasons! And anyway, not everyone wants you to die. My friend, Ellie, wants you to date Angel.

Dylan: SHE'S ONLY SIX! I'M SIXTEEN!

Gem: No, you have the mind and body of a sixteen year old but you've only been alive for a couple of months. Max is out of your league.

Angel: He's too sad for me.

Dylan: I've never cried in my life!

Gem: NOT IN THAT WAY, STUPID! Sad is another way for saying sick and evil. Or just plain stupid.

Dylan: But I'm not sick or evil!

Gem: Your trying to spilt up the Fax! NOW SHUT UP! The questions are:

To Fang, how would you propose to Max because u know she's hard to impress?

To Nudge: When did u get your first make up set?

Fang: I'd propose to Max in front of Dylan so it'll kill him and Max will be happy.

Max: *Grins*

Nudge: OOMG! I was about eight or seven when Jeb let us out of our cages and took us for hot coca somewhere in the school and he gave us all Christmas presents and I had a make-up set! I wanted to give Max a make-over but she said no and nobody else would let me put blusher on them. After Jeb let, the erasers smashed up our stuff then Max punched them because me, Gazzy and Angel we're crying.

Gem: Your right, it IS worse than in the books!


	4. Why Iggy was so grumpy

Gem: Three more questions from Chocogirl24! :D

Iggy: Not her again!

Gem: Oi! Be nice to my reviewers! Actually, one of the questions is to you, Ig. Why are you so grumpy?

Iggy: I'm not grumpy!

Gem: Yeah, and pigs fly.

Iggy: Dylan flies. That's the same thing, right?

Gem: ...Okay, I'll give you that one. *Holds up machine gun* now answer the question.

Iggy: Fine. *points at Ella* She broke up with be!

Everyone but Ella and Iggy: *gasp* Why?

Ella: Iggy groped me.

Valencia: You what!

Iggy: I'm blind! I didn't _mean _to. *turns to Ella* I'm sorry about what I did. Really sorry. I promise I won't do it again.

Valencia: *slaps Iggy's face* THAT'S FOR GROPING MY DAUGHTER, YOU DIRTY B****D!

Everyone apart from Iggy and Valencia: *gasp*

Max: LANGUAGE INFRONT OF THE BABIES! *Points at Angel, Gazzy, Nudge and Ari*

Ella: It's okay, Ig. I forgive you *smiles* I just wanted a sorry. I love you.

Valencia: *grabs Iggy's shirt* Touch her like that again and I'll squash you like a bug!

Iggy: Okay, Miss. Martinez. Won't do it again.

Gem: *whispers to Max and Ella* Your mom's feisty!

Iggy and Ella: *hold hands*

Gem: Utter randomness. Mood swings.

Gazzy: What?

Gem: Never mind. Next question! For Fang and Max: How would you rather kill Dylan? With a machine gun or cut off his wings then push him off a cliff?

Dylan: She really doesn't like me does she?

Gem: Max? Of course not, she hates your guts.

Dylan: Not Max. Max loves deep down. Chocogirl24 doesn't like me.

Max: I HATE YOUR GUTS, DYLAN! To answer the question, I think I'll cut off his wings and push him off a cliff.

Fang: And if he survives that, shoot him with the machine gun.

Gem: Cool. Personally, I'd feed Gazzy LOADS OF BAKED BEANS then trap him and Dylan in an air tight room. :D Or tell Nudge that Dylan is going to send her to a Nun place where they can't speak then Nudge will kill him.

Nudge: ARE YOU REALLY?

Dylan: NO!

Iggy: I LOVE ELLA!

Valencia :Iggy... Groping...Ella...Iggy...grr.

Gem: Right, in the next chapter, we talk exclusively to Angel and why is she so evil! Send in your Angel questions!


	5. Angel reveals a gasping secret

Gem: Firstly, I will deal with your requests before I get to the questions.

Jeb: Why so formal?

Gem: Shut up, Jeb. Right *turns to Gazzy* I LOVE PYrOS said that she is a blonde. A dirty blonde.

Gazzy: YES!

Gem: *frowns.* It must be a boy thing...*turns to Fang* Skalvakotaluvsfang says she loves you. *turns to Max* How can you cope with all these fan girls?

Max: You get used to it.

Gem: *turns to Iggy* I must be on some turning thing. Chocogirl24 says sorry for being mean.

Iggy: I don't think she was being mean. She just asked a question.

Gem: Finally, *turns to Dylan* I saved the best to last, Dyl.

Dylan: YAY! Someone likes me!

Gem: *slaps Dylan's face* that's from Chocogirl24 and this is from Skalvakotaluvsfang:

I HATE YOU DYALN!

*slaps Dylan's face again* and that was just for the fun of it. I LOVE PYROS, you questions will be asked in the next chapter so don't worry. :D

Spotlight: * lights Angel*

Gem: It's time to ask Angel.

Scary music: *plays*

Angel: Where the heck did that come from?

Gem: No idea. Right, first question from Chocogirl24:

Dear Angel, do you regret betraying Max? If not, will you do it again?

Angel: Of course I regret betraying Max! I almost got Fang killed! Then Max would have killed me.

Max from somewhere in the dark: You've got that right!

Angel: I might cheat at poker, but I wouldn't betray her again.

Max in the dark: NO!

Gem: The next question is from Skalvakotaluvsfang:

Why are you so bipolar?

Angel: What's bipolar?

Gem: Like one second your sweet and then the next you almost kill Fang.

Angel: I was getting tired of being bossed around by Max.

Gem: But she was trying to keep you safe!

Angel: I know buy my voice kept telling me that I should go for flock leader and then that day I kicked her out, Jeb said we should.

Everyone but Angel and Jeb: *Gasp!*

Jeb from somewhere in the dark: I didn't!

Gem:* Turns lights on* Okay, Jeb did try to get back into the flock the day before so I'm not really that shocked.

Jeb now in the light: But I didn't! You have no proof!

Gem: *Waves Fang (the book, not fang) in the air* we'll see shall we? WARNING! SPOLIERS FOR FANG IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED READING THE BOOK!

Jeb: *gulps*

Gem: *Reads out load* He gestured to the disaster before us. "This clearly isn't working You need help. I think I should come back and live here. I should take up where I left off." That's Jeb speaking.

Max: *gasp* you lying son of a female dog!

Angel: A puppy?

Gem: *laughing spasm* In the next cha[ter, someone will have a makeover preformed by Nudge! Vote for who you'd like to see with eyeshadow! *goes back to the laughing spasm*


	6. Dylan seems familiar

Gem: =O

Max: Why is she like that?

Fang: Take a look at how many reviews she's had.

Max: OMG! _Thirteen _in only _five chapters! _Has that even happened before to her?

Fang: I think she's in shock.

Max: Alright, I'll have to take it for a while. * peeps over my shoulder* Iggy-is-my-imprint says:

Tell Gazzy she's blonde too and her friend livvy ( Does she mean Libby?) has a MASSIVE crush on him and she's got black hair.

Gazzy: I'm a Ladies man!

Max: I HAVEN'T FINSIHED! Also, Iggy, if you don't go out with her, Ella will die a slow painful death. *Screws eyes* Kill my sister and I will murder you in your sleep!

Fang: That's not nice!

Max: I know. She thinks she can kill my sister!

Fang: No, murdering her in her sleep! I get it all the time and your still here.

Erasers: Sadly.

Max: SHUT UP! Also Iggy-is-my-imprint says she's been taking lessons from Angel and it's worth 50 dollars a go. Also, she thinks Dylan is a fupping grasshole.

Dylan: That's not bad!

Fang: She means fucking ass hole.

Max: LANGUAGE!

Fang: Sorry...

Max: grr...I LOVE PYROS asks can Angel control JP to make Gazzy three years older.

Angel: But JP isn't here...

Gazzy: NO! I WANT TO STAY YOUNG!

Nudge: EVELVEN IS YOUNG! *smacks Gazzy's head*

Max: *sighs* Chocoggirl24 says that she hopes that slap hurt for Dylan. Andromache Andy Michaels 6-26 says she is completely in love Iggy...

Ella: *pulls out a very large gun* they all have to get through me first!

Max: Where did you get that?

Ella: Where do you think?

Max: Iggy! Don't give my sister guns!

Fang: How shall we wake her up?

Gazzy: I know how! *grins*

Everyone: Oh no...

Gazzy: *farts*

Everyone: EWW! OMG! IM GONNA DIE!

Gem:* Wakes up* It smells...familiar...

Max: It's Gazzy...

Gem: *shrugs*it's not that bad...

Everyone: *gasps!*

Nudge: NOT THAT BAD! IT SMELLS LIKE ROTTON CABBAGES AND SPROUTS MIXED TO GETHER WITH MOULDY BEANS! IT'S WORSE THAN AN ERASER THAT HASN'T HAD A BATH ALL IT'S LIFE!

Ari: *cough* hey!

Gem: Have you lived with my father? Nothing is as bad as that. I'd better get on with those announcements.

Max: I've done them but I've left the questions.

Gem: Okay. First question to Max: Why did it take you so long to realise/admit you're in love with Fang?

Max: Like I said, I was kind of busy worrying about the Flock's safety but one day, it just clicked. Like a switch.

Gem: And you didn't admit it because you were too stubborn and don't really like showing emotions?

Max: Actually, yes. I'M NOT STUBBORN!

Gem: Face it. You are. Next question to Iggy from Panda-Hiroko -my friend loves pandas. Are you gay and out for Gazzy's heart and if so, were there be seduction involved?

Iggy: *explodes* NEVER! I LOVE ELLA!

Gazzy: He's my best friend, not some secret lover and, OMG, he's fifteen! I'm eight!

Gem: ALRIGHT I GET YOUR POINT!

Gazzy: *huffs*

Gem: Now, I vill reveal vo vill be having a make-over by Nudge!

T.B: Vquit it vith ze accent!

Gem: With a total of three votes against one for Iggy and another for Jeb, it is...DYLAN!

Dylan: NOOOOOO!

Nudge: WOO!

Gem: *ties Dylan up to a chair* Nudge, go wild! *hands Nudge a make-up kit, a pair of scissors and tweezers, fake tan and crazy colours hair dyes*

Nudge: HEHE!

Dylan: Help me!

Everyone else: NEVER!

Nudge: Right, a bit of lipstick should do it...hmm...pink, I think...lovely and add some lip gloss...pretty...a bit of light foundation there... and there...and all over...grr, that lock of hair is getting in my way *grabs scissors* bye hair!

Dylan: NO! NOT THE SEXY HAIR COVERINGTHE EYES! *cries as it falls onto his lap*

Everyone: *gasps*

Max: You never told us you had one blue eye and one red eye!

Gunther: It's the only thing that went wrong with him...you should love him, Max.

Gem: The things wrong with Dylan are...everything.

Nudge: AHEM! Right, a bit of blue eyes shadow,...some red blusher here... grr, those eyebrows are too hairy! *grabs tweezers and plucks like crazy* Damn, it's gone all red and swollen...I hope this concealer works...finally, mascara! *pokes Dylan in the eye*

Dylan: OW! THAT HURT! WAAAAAAAA!

Nudge: Shut up, you baby. And...now...some...hair dye...hmm...black i think...okay, now eye contacts...and finally, a pair of specs and TA DA!

Dylan: *looks in the mirror* I LOOK LIKE A WOMANIZED HARRY POTTER!

Gem: *snigger*

Dylan: *has pink glossy lips, red cheeks, pale skin, no eyebrows, round specs, black hair, mascara and blue eye shadow* WHY ME?

Gem: Will you try to steal Max from Fang?

Dylan: BUT SHE LOVES ME DEAD DOWN!

Gem: Wrong answer. *shaves off all of Dylan's hair*

Dylan: WHY!

Gem: Alright, in the next chapter we will be talking exclusively to Maximum Ride and her Family (but Fang) so send in your questions!


	7. Questions for Doctor Valenica Martinez

Gem: Sorry I've been away for a while. School has had me ragged! Half a day tomorrow then the CHRIMBO HOLS!

Angel: What's Chrimbo?

Gem: Short for Christmas.

Angel: Oh.

Gem: Right, FIRST QUESTION! To Valencia, from Chocogirl24:

Did you know from the first time you saw Max she was your long lost daughter?

Valencia: I wasn't sure but I was kind of hopeful. She does look a bit like me. With the brownish hair and brown eyes. And the cheek bones. And the freckle behind the ear.

Gem: You have a freckle behind the ear?

Valencia: It was the wings that made me certain. More or less.

Gem: Okay then. Second question to Valencia again. This time from Iggy-is-my-imprint. :

Do you think that it is ironic how you are a vet and the flock are avian Americans?

Valencia: A bit, yes. I always wanted to be a vet. When they asked for my egg they said that they were going to combine it with just a sperm but they then told me it was combined with the wrong sperm, from a bird, then it died.

Gem: Ouch. Damn those idiots.

Ari and Angel: *giggle*

Gem: What are you two giggling about?

Ari: She said sperm! *points at Valencia*

Gem: So immature. And that is the end to our Maximum Ride family exclusive. Wasn't very exclusive, was it? *sighs* Hey Nudge, Iggy-is-my-imprint wants to know what do you find cool about the colour purple...

Nudge: ZOMG! I LOVE PURPLE! It's sooooooooo cool because it goes with some colours e.g. Black, yellow, pink and it looks nice against my skin and with my hair and all because I'm dark and when I was ten, I drew a WHOLE collection of purple clothes and I LOVE the vibrant and luminous warm socks things and the fluffy tutu.

Gem: Okay...*prays* please no more questions for Nudge, please no questions for Nudge *looks at the next review* DAMN!

Nudge: WOO HOO!

Gem: Panda-Hiroko asks, wait!*runs to the bushes and pulls someone out* PANDA HIROKO!

Panda: Damn! How did you find me?

Gem: You said in your review.

Panda: Oh yah. *glances at Iggy* OMG IT'S IGGY! *drools*

Ella: *grabs Iggy's hand* He's mine.

Gem: Alright. Panda, ask Nudge yourself.

Panda: Okay! Nudge, have you ever had dirty thoughts about animals?

Nudge: *frowns* I once wanted to marry Scooby Doo but that's it.

Panda: Scooby Doo? Really?

Gem: Apparently yes. Two more questions left and both from I LOVE PRYOS. First one:

To Gazzy: Do you find me annoying?

To Max: If Fang had to kiss any other girl on the lips but you and his life depended on it who would it be? Ella, Nudge or Lissa?

Max: DEFINETLY NOT LISSA! Not Ella because she's my sister and it would be TOTALLY weird so Nudge.

Nudge: IM NEVER GOING TO KISS FANG!

Gem: Me and my friend, Lozzy98, wet ourselves over stupid parings and then we blend their names together for fun. Fudge. Mylan. Fangle. Fylan.

Max: Eww.

Gem: I know. Fangle just sounds wrong.

Gazzy: CAN I ANSWER MY QUESTION PLEASE?

Gem: Alright, keep your wings on!

Gazzy: No, I don't find you annoying.

Gem: *turns to Panda* I hope you don't mind calling you Panda for short and my friend loves Pandas. And she loves Iggy. *turns back to the camera* Now, in ze next chapter, ve vill be talking to onlz ze baddies.

Ter Borcht: ZUIT IT VITH ZE ACCENT!

Gem: Stuff it, fatty.


	8. Ze baddies vill get questioned! MWHAHA!

Gem: Velcome to ze baddy chapter. For ze rest of ze chapter, I vill be talking in zis accent.

Ter Borcht: *grumbles*

Gem: Ze first question for ze baddies iz for ... Ter Borcht from Nathan-P.

Ter Borcht: At least I vill get a question.

Gem: Ze questions iz:

Would you fuck me?

Max: LANGUAGE!

Gem: Vine. Ze question iz:

Would you fupp me?

Ter Borcht: Vhat does 'fuck' mean?

Gem: Vit means 'to have sex'

Ter Borcht: I do not 'fuck'.

Gem: Vhat? Vut vis iz your biggest fan!

Ter Borcht: I am sorry vut I do not reproduce or even have sex!

Gem: No vonder you like to experiment on humans. Ze next question is how do you take your coffee?

Ter Borcht: In a delightful vhite mug. Vith milk.

Gem: Okay. For Jeb, vhat is you favorite kind of sandwich?

Jeb: I like egg mayo with cress leaves and brown bread.

Gem: I have had vone of those from Boots. Very nice, yah? Frau Janssen: You have the power to bring back one technology no longer in use. What do you pick and why?

Janssen: No idea. At all. Maybe the video tape because I haven't got a DVD player. Probably. Maybe. No idea.

Gem: Okay, for Ari, Junk Food? Yes? No? What kind?

Ari: I like potato chips, French fries, cookies, soda, hamburgers, Twinkies, corndogs, and-

Gem: OKAY, okay. For Reilly, would you like more attention? Vo ze veck iz Reilly?

Reilly from in the corner: I'm Reilly! I would like more attention!

Gem: Vine, go blame James Patterson. Vinal question for Dr. Gunther Hagen: Tell me three other experiments other than Dylan and Jean.

G-H: Wait? Why am I classed as a villain? I created Dylan for Max. I should be classed as a hero!

Gem: You? A hero? You created Dylan so you are a baddie. Answer ze question.

G-H: I have successfully created a clone of Dylan just in case the original tragically dies-

Max: As if that would be tragic!

G-H: Also a half lizard, half person who I have named Peter, and a half woman half ape woman who seems to scream alot and is very cowardly.

Gem: Vhat iz a vomen named Gillian McKeith

Gazzy: Hey, Gunther, you see that spare Dylan over there? *points at a far away Dylan* He's going up in smoke *presses a button then Dylan 2 blows up*

Max, Fang and every Dylan hater and Fax lover everywhere: YAY!

G-H: *sniff* I worked by butt off to get that cloning machine right.

Gem: Ve have a question from Chocogirl24:

Ter Borcht-Do you like snickers bars.

Ter Borcht: No vay! Zey are disguhsting!

Gem: *stuffs a snickers bars into his mouth* Stuff it, Vatty. Question for Jeb from Splotchpelt:

Who is Ari's mom?

Jeb: Arianna, a girl I met in collage. She died at child birth.

Gem: Aww. Now, ve must put our questions on hold for a chapter, sorry.

Everybody: Aww!

Gem: I know vut I vant you to send in your Xmas Carols for all of us to sing! I vill give you a example

Everybody: *gets into 'the choir standing'*

Gem: And a von, and a two, and a von, two, three four:

Everybody: *starts to sing Jingle Bells: Where ever Martha Coleman got it-style*

_Dashing through the snow,_

_On a broken pair of skis,_

_Over hills we go,_

_Crashing into trees,_

_Ow, Ow, Ow._

_The snow is turning red,_

_I think I'm nearly dead,_

_Then I wake up in hospital with a crazy nurse named Fred,_

_OH!_

Gem: So send in you carols (spoofed ones are welcome) and MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Iggy: OMG! She said Christmas instead of Chrimbo!

Gem: *smacks Iggy* 


	9. Max is confused?

Gem: I apologise for not updating for a while. I had a new laptop for Xmas and I couldn't have the internet for HALF AN HOUR! Also, visit my profile to answer my poll about who should have the amazing Maximum Ride!

Angel: Are we going to sing Christmas Carols?

Gem: Sadly, no one has requested any so no.

Angel: Aww.

Gem: We've had a couple of questions, though.

Angel: Yay!

Gem: First questions from Splotchpelt:

Valencia - May I call you Val? Who's Ella's dad?

Valencia: You may call me Val and Ella's dad is my late husband who died before Ella was born.

Gem: Love yah. Next question:

Iggy – If you ever dumped Ella, I'm not saying if you did but if you did would you go out with me?

Iggy: Counts if I like you or not. *smiles*

Gem: I wonder who has more fans? Fang or Iggy? Next question for Dylan:

Dylan-Will you just die already?*slams Dylan*

Dylan: *sniff* No...not until Max and I make love!

Gem: *throws up* that's disgusting! Coming away from that horrible quote from Dylan, the next question is for Max's ONLY lover, Fang:

Fang – Why did you leave?

Fang: I left because Dylan kept getting in my way from loving Max. I couldn't stand him. I'm a jerk for leaving, I know but also I'm a danger to them because I am in danger and I might die so if I am standing next to Max, I'm putting her in danger as well.

Gem: Ah, but how many times have you almost died _saving _Max. You might sacrifice yourself for her but if you leave, she might die because you weren't there.

Fang: True. But I'm back now.

Gem: Thank God, next question to Nudge:

Nudge- Got any fashion tips?

Nudge: Black goes with anything! Try wearing a plain black top with vibrant accessories and whatever trousers you want. Also, for the Summer seasons, a peachy orange top would go nice with those thick pale orange bangles with denim short and gladiator sandals maybe.

Gem: Nice. Final question from Splotchpelt to the Gasman:

Gazzy- Why are you against brunettes?

Gasman: I'm not against brunettes; I just like blondes better. Don't know why but I do. Like Fang likes red heads.

Fang: *blushes*

Max: Grr...

Gem: Question for Maximum from my top reviewer, Chocogirl24!

Max – did u feel like a quitter when you ran away from the amazing Fang so many times?

Max: Mope, I felt confused. It's weird. I never felt like that before and I was sooooo confused I didn't even know what I was doing!

Gem: A bit like my friend when she got asked out by this boy she liked as a friend and once went out with him before. She didn't know what to say so she just turned and ran. Next question to Fang:

Fang -Sorry Max, I think ur kewl and everything but fang is mine so will u marry me fang?

Fang: I'm kind of dating someone else, sorry Chocogirl24.

Max: If I had a nickel for every time I heard a fan girl say that...

Gem: LOL! If you put fan and girl next to each other you'll have Fangirl!

Crickets: *Do their crickety rub legs together thing*

Gem : FANGirl? Get it?

Crickets: *still rub their legs together*

Gem: *sigh*


	10. Total Returns!

Gem: OMG! I'm sorry I haven't been able to update for a while! My Microsoft died but now it is back! *throws confetti* and we have a TON of questions! Yippee!

Everyone: YAY!

Gem: Okies, here goes! These questions are from I LOVE PYROS!

Iggy – How do you feel about being the pervert in every single FanFiction?

Fang – How do you feel about having so many FANGirls?

Max – How do you feel about Fang having so many FANGirls?

Nudge – How do you feel being paired with Iggy in almost every FanFiction?

Iggy: HOLD IT! _I'm_ the pervert! Why? Since when have I been pervert-y?

Gem: In Book 3 when you, Fang and Gazzy are on the beach and you asked Fang to describe the girls to you.

Iggy: Okay. APART from then?

Gem: …I cannot think…

Iggy: HA! It really hurts, being called the pervert. It does. It really does.

Fang: I don't mind having many fan girls. You kinda get used to it.

Iggy: Not as many as me though *grins*

Fang: *high fives Iggy*

Max: Fang having fan girls is really annoying but you just have to live with it.

Gem: I'm not a big fan of Fang…

Angel: You're wearing a shirt that say's "I am a FANGirl."

Gem: Oh yeah. *Cheesy smiles*

Nudge: OMG! I'm paired with IGGY! That's like totally 'eww' because he is like my brother but then Max and Fang are together and they're like brother and sister, right? Anyway, it could be worse, like. I mean, it could be someone like Gazzy or Jeb or Ari or Dylan.

Gem: Or Angel.

Nudge: 0.o what?

Gem: *shows Nudge 'Nangel' fanfiction*

Nudge: OMG! *dies then comes back to life*

Gem: Okies. Also, I LOVE PYROS says that she's Gazzy's number one fan girl.

The Gasman: Love ya *winks*

Gem: Next questions from my number one reviewer, Chocogirl!

Fang – Are you sure you don't want to marry me?

All of the Boys – Would anyone date an Asian?

Fang: I'm sure.

Iggy: I don't really care if I dated an Asian. I don't care about skin colours or where they come from. As long as they're kind of good looking and isn't evil.

Fang: I prefer the bird type but Asian bird is okay. But I have Max.

Reilly: I'm dating an Asian.

Everyone: Since when?

Reilly: Book Six **(AN/ isn't really)**

Gasman: I don't care. *shrugs*

Gem: it's good to know you guys ain't racist and shallow. Next questions are from IggywiLLsaVeMe2012:

Max – Have you ever had a crush on Iggy?

Iggy – What was it like when you found out you were blind?

Max: Nope. Fang is my first (and only).

Iggy: At first, I thought I was in some kind of experiment because everything was just black but then Max told me that I had lost my sight. I started crying and I was slamming my fists against the walls of my cage and throwing a tantrum thing.

Max: You had to be put to sleep to stop.

Fang: Wasn't nice to watch. *Shudders*

Gem: *wipes tear* I can only imagine what you went through, Ig.

Ella: *hugs Iggy*

Gem: Andromache Andy Michaels 6-26 wants to know if Iggy likes brunettes.

Iggy: I like brunettes. Ella's one, right?

Ella: Yep!

Iggy: Cool.

Gem: Next question is from WhiteWinterStar:

Fang – Do you think Miggy is a waste of time?

Fang: I like Miggy better than Mylan. As long as Max is with someone I actually trust and like and I don't think is a butt-sniffing jerk.

Gem: Well said, Fang. Well said. Next question is from Elise the Amazing:

Iggy – Please explain why you and Ella belong together?

Iggy: I really, really like her and it feels…right. If I was with Nudge, well, I don't want to go deaf as well as blind.

Ella: I love you Iggy.

Iggy: I love you too, Ella.

Gem: 0.0 Okies, next question! It's from Splotchpelt!

All the guys – Does anyone like brunettes?

Fang: I do *glances at Max*

Dylan: I LOVE BRUNETTES *Stares at Max*

Iggy: Ella is a brunette, right?

Ella: Right.

Jeb: I like brunettes *glances at Dr. Martinez*

Ari: I don't care about hair colours.

Gem: I think Ari is the only one with a brain!

Gasman: I don't mind brunettes. I just prefer blondes.

Gem: Okay…Next questions are from MangaLuver1423:

Dylan – Would you become gay? Have you considered it?

Gem – Where's Total

Total – Why do you dislike regular dog food?

Valencia – What was the strangest animal you ever treated?

Nudge – What is your favourite music?

Max – Do you think Dylan should jump of a cliff, with no wings, and finally leave you and fang alone?

Angel – What is the scariest/strangest mind you have read?

Dylan: NO! I WILL BE WITH MAX! BEING GAY IS NOT AN OPTION!

Gem: OMG! I have a question! And half a cookie!

Max: Gimme a bit!

Gem: NEVER! *eats half a cookie* Yummy. Total is away on his honeymoon with Alika. He'll be back to answer your question later.

Valencia: The strangest animal I have ever treated must have been the psychotic cat.

Gem: Do tell.

Valencia: Well, this person came in with this cat and as soon as I opened the cage door, it jumped out and started rolling all over the table. It kept having spasms and biting its leg then jumping up and down and making moaning noises.

Everyone: 0.o

Valencia: I had to strap it down and put it to sleep for an hour while I injected it with some anti-anti-depressants. I put it under medication for three years and apparently, it's okay now.

Gem: Wierd.

Nudge: OMG! I LOVE pop music! I have all the Pop Party Cds with awesome songs like Brittany Spears and Busted and Pink and Avril Lavigne! R&B is cool too like Jay-Z and Rihanna and Beyoncé. My favourite song must be 'Only Girl' by Rihanna right now but I love music so much, my favourite song is always changing! I like the High School Musical songs as well as Camp Rock!

Gem: OKAY!

Max: As long as Dylan is dead, I don't care about how he dies.

Angel: I once read Mickey Mouse's mind. Please don't ask!

Everyone: 0.0

Gem: Okay….

Total: IM BACK!

Angel: YAY! TOTAL! *hugs him*

Gem: Total, we have a question for you!

Total: Really? YES!

Gem: Why do you dislike dog food?

Total: Have you SMELT it? It's disgusting! And it looks all slimy and revolting. DO you think dog food looks appetizing?

Gem: Nope.

Total: My point made!

Gem: Okay, that is the end of this chapter. But listen closely.

Gem: MangaLuver1423 has asked a question of great importance. Who has more fans? Iggy or Fang? Ask your friends who is better and add them all up. Example review:

Fang – 12 fans

Iggy – 12 fans

Please include yourself. I will ask my friends and in the next chapter, I will reveal who has the most fans. To those who read and don't bother reviewing, review just this once. Please?

PS

GO CARADOG!


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